I've been a busy girl.
I've written this, about America's unhealthiest foods.
I've also written this, about how xylitol, a sugar substitute, prevents cavities....what? Yep, it's true. Although my holistic self wonders how long it'll be before we find out that scientifically twisting up a naturally occurring chemical, no matter how good-for-you it is on the vine, has a negative effect once it's all down to chemicals and compounds....
But anyway. Have you watched Home yet? It's amazing. And is available to watch online, for free, and legally too. And no, I have nothing to do with the movie, and they don't even know I'm advertising for them :) It's that good.
Check it out. Let me know what you think. Seriously. It'll be the best 93 minutes you spend all day. Okay, I can think of a couple of better ways to spend 93 minutes....but anyway.
On another note, today is Tuesday. Which means we're into the week, and busy, but not tired of it yet :) I hope. Because if you are, there's still a ton to go! So just don't think about it. Besides, it's summer! And it's beautiful outside! And if you don't get to go outside the same way that I don't, we can always be thankful that we don't have any awkward tan lines, right?
By the way, I have a 1920's party to attend this Saturday. Any of y'all have any tips for flappering it up? I tried on a few of those short and fringed flapper dresses, but none of them caught my fancy, so I'll be doing a homemade costume. I'm thinking about going for a more evening look, wearing that awesome dress I got for the January wedding, and doing it up with long beads, red lipstick and a flowered headband...thoughts? Suggestions? I'll take em!
Today's whiteboard quote:
"What we must realize is that we cannot see everything. We do not know everything. More important, we must understand that it's impossible for us to control anything."
~Iyanla Vanzant
(I'm not going to admit that this one is a challenge for me, the control freak of the century. Wait, I just did...oh well.)
Showing posts with label positive thinking. Show all posts
Showing posts with label positive thinking. Show all posts
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Pick Your Poison
On any given day, any one of us may feel a little doldrumy. No, that's not necessarily a word, but it is now as far as I'm concerned.
Anyway.
I'll go off of the assumption here that most of us would not rather be in a bad mood. And of course, those of us who would aren't consciously aware of it - why would anyone ever choose to be glum?
Er, it comes from habit, but that's for another post.
I'm also not talking about sweet melancholy - that emotion when, in a healthy balance combined with all of the other colors that make up our fluid states of being, creates a gorgeous, complex and ever-changing mandala of life experience.
There isn't a thing in the world wrong with some healthy melancholy. In my experience (I am very well versed from years of practice), when in a temporary context, it can be enjoyed as a way of slowing down. If it's really acknowledged and accepted as a valid emotion (rather than immediately suppressed, also from habit and a cultural belief that anything other that a smiling face is "bad"), it coats the world before your eyes in a sort of delicate veil, making the light burn differently and giving credence to the sensuousness of curling up in a warm blanket for a quiet contemplative time, just for yourself. Janet Luhrs even touches on this type of melancholy in relationships, mainly as a way of accepting your lover's moods using the lens of unconditional love rather that being stuck within the constraints of expectations, in her book Simple Loving - a must read for all of us who are pursuing the ever-elusive "perfect relationship".
But I've digressed again. The original point of this post was to talk about choosing to be joyful - or if that's too big a stretch, choosing to adopt a relaxed and accepting "go-with-the-flow" attitude.
Today's trick for doing that is to think back on some of your most proud achievements, or even just your ultimately lucky moments.
If you ever won a contest that you gave your all for, or created a truly beautiful piece of art, or aced the interview and got that perfect job you were wanting, or finally got up the courage to start a relationship with the person you'd been admiring from afar...
It doesn't matter if by now the contest winnings have come and gone, or if the art is sold or just doesn't hold that sparkle for you anymore, or if you've moved on from the job or the lover.
Do you remember how you felt when you got the news and you felt those mind-fireworks that, with their little explosions, brought waves of joy, satisfaction, and pride?
Do you remember how great you felt, knowing that you'd achieved something that you had been working for, whether the reward was expected or not? Remember that sense of self-confidence that surged within you because you'd proven that you could achieve that thing that you'd been reaching and grasping for?
Revel in that memory for a moment. Swim in the feeling, let it permeate your body and mind.
Now, return to the present. No matter how under-the-emotional-weather you're feeling, or how much that old goal has lost its luster once it was achieved, remember that you did it.
You still did that thing that made you so proud and happy - you still have all of those qualities that were affirmed to you by reaching your goal.
That's who you are.
All that has changed are your thoughts.
Just think - if you could monitor and choose the internal winds that drive you, what you'd be capable of....
Now, what are your goals for the day?
Today's whiteboard quote:
"In life, you can never do a kindness too soon because you never know how soon it will be too late."
~Ralph Waldo Emerson
Anyway.
I'll go off of the assumption here that most of us would not rather be in a bad mood. And of course, those of us who would aren't consciously aware of it - why would anyone ever choose to be glum?
Er, it comes from habit, but that's for another post.
I'm also not talking about sweet melancholy - that emotion when, in a healthy balance combined with all of the other colors that make up our fluid states of being, creates a gorgeous, complex and ever-changing mandala of life experience.
There isn't a thing in the world wrong with some healthy melancholy. In my experience (I am very well versed from years of practice), when in a temporary context, it can be enjoyed as a way of slowing down. If it's really acknowledged and accepted as a valid emotion (rather than immediately suppressed, also from habit and a cultural belief that anything other that a smiling face is "bad"), it coats the world before your eyes in a sort of delicate veil, making the light burn differently and giving credence to the sensuousness of curling up in a warm blanket for a quiet contemplative time, just for yourself. Janet Luhrs even touches on this type of melancholy in relationships, mainly as a way of accepting your lover's moods using the lens of unconditional love rather that being stuck within the constraints of expectations, in her book Simple Loving - a must read for all of us who are pursuing the ever-elusive "perfect relationship".
But I've digressed again. The original point of this post was to talk about choosing to be joyful - or if that's too big a stretch, choosing to adopt a relaxed and accepting "go-with-the-flow" attitude.
Today's trick for doing that is to think back on some of your most proud achievements, or even just your ultimately lucky moments.
If you ever won a contest that you gave your all for, or created a truly beautiful piece of art, or aced the interview and got that perfect job you were wanting, or finally got up the courage to start a relationship with the person you'd been admiring from afar...
It doesn't matter if by now the contest winnings have come and gone, or if the art is sold or just doesn't hold that sparkle for you anymore, or if you've moved on from the job or the lover.
Do you remember how you felt when you got the news and you felt those mind-fireworks that, with their little explosions, brought waves of joy, satisfaction, and pride?
Do you remember how great you felt, knowing that you'd achieved something that you had been working for, whether the reward was expected or not? Remember that sense of self-confidence that surged within you because you'd proven that you could achieve that thing that you'd been reaching and grasping for?
Revel in that memory for a moment. Swim in the feeling, let it permeate your body and mind.
Now, return to the present. No matter how under-the-emotional-weather you're feeling, or how much that old goal has lost its luster once it was achieved, remember that you did it.
You still did that thing that made you so proud and happy - you still have all of those qualities that were affirmed to you by reaching your goal.
That's who you are.
All that has changed are your thoughts.
Just think - if you could monitor and choose the internal winds that drive you, what you'd be capable of....
Now, what are your goals for the day?
Today's whiteboard quote:
"In life, you can never do a kindness too soon because you never know how soon it will be too late."
~Ralph Waldo Emerson
Friday, June 26, 2009
Shore
It's been a rough week. TGIF has never been more heartfelt as it echoed through my mind this morning, just as an unladylike four-letter word echoed through my quiet room right after the alarm began to sound...
At times like these, when there's an internal conflict involving trepidation and stress, and when thinking about the problem doesn't make it better, but only attacking it proactively would, but you're too exhausted and confused to even formulate a plan, much less do anything about it, I have a practice that always helps.
It's simple, but more difficult than you may automatically think.
The effect is also simple - it's as if you've placed your mind and your point of perceiving (your Self with a capital S) into a stream. It's almost as if your mind is washed with cool, clear, moving water and you begin to feel refreshed and renewed. It's subtle though, and usually takes a couple of hours to take effect.
For me, it takes less than an hour to start to make me feel better. It takes longer to finish. Roughly a day.
The trick I use is to stretch out to the edges of my skin.
It sounds funny, I know.
And it also doesn't work well at all if I'm in physical pain of any kind.
But, when the pain and fatigue is mental (it also works nicely if you're a bit physically tired), this does the job nicely.
I put all of my attention on two of my five senses. The main one is touch. I really feel everything that I touch. My fingertips tingle with aliveness. My spine straightens and becomes stronger and more graceful with the attention I'm giving it. My jaw relaxes and my eyes become more alert. That's when the second sense kicks in - sight. And not just everything, but how colors and shapes and light are in the world around me.
This is more subtle, again, I envision it as stretching out within myself and inhabiting only the edges of my body. I think most of us usually feel buried in here somewhere. Spending time noticing things you don't ordinarily take account of is freeing. For instance, I'm typing right now. How often do I notice what these keys feel like under my fingers? Not as often as I should.
How often do I notice, really notice, the cool breeze against my cheeks as I walk outside? Or feel my keys as they jangle in my hand? We're used to the meaning of it all (I pay attention to WHAT I'm typing, not just the ACT of typing), rather than the feel of doing it. Once you learn how to wield a fork and knife as a child it's as if your hand disappears. You're not aware of its action, only of what you want to happen because of it - you darned well know where those fork prongs are, but where is your pinkie finger? As I sit and type this, I honestly can't tell you where the heck it lies when I use silverware.
And on and on.
After awhile what I've found is that my body takes over and feels the pure joy in just living that tends to get buried under the 'in-your-head'ness of it all....and that visceral joy commandeers your attention and emotion, so you can't help dancing just a little too.
On the inside, of course.
And like I said, it's subtle.
But just for kicks, try it. Give it a go. Tell me what happens.
Today's whiteboard quote:
"One doesn't discover new lands without consenting to lose sight of the shore for a very long time."
~Andre Gide
At times like these, when there's an internal conflict involving trepidation and stress, and when thinking about the problem doesn't make it better, but only attacking it proactively would, but you're too exhausted and confused to even formulate a plan, much less do anything about it, I have a practice that always helps.
It's simple, but more difficult than you may automatically think.
The effect is also simple - it's as if you've placed your mind and your point of perceiving (your Self with a capital S) into a stream. It's almost as if your mind is washed with cool, clear, moving water and you begin to feel refreshed and renewed. It's subtle though, and usually takes a couple of hours to take effect.
For me, it takes less than an hour to start to make me feel better. It takes longer to finish. Roughly a day.
The trick I use is to stretch out to the edges of my skin.
It sounds funny, I know.
And it also doesn't work well at all if I'm in physical pain of any kind.
But, when the pain and fatigue is mental (it also works nicely if you're a bit physically tired), this does the job nicely.
I put all of my attention on two of my five senses. The main one is touch. I really feel everything that I touch. My fingertips tingle with aliveness. My spine straightens and becomes stronger and more graceful with the attention I'm giving it. My jaw relaxes and my eyes become more alert. That's when the second sense kicks in - sight. And not just everything, but how colors and shapes and light are in the world around me.
This is more subtle, again, I envision it as stretching out within myself and inhabiting only the edges of my body. I think most of us usually feel buried in here somewhere. Spending time noticing things you don't ordinarily take account of is freeing. For instance, I'm typing right now. How often do I notice what these keys feel like under my fingers? Not as often as I should.
How often do I notice, really notice, the cool breeze against my cheeks as I walk outside? Or feel my keys as they jangle in my hand? We're used to the meaning of it all (I pay attention to WHAT I'm typing, not just the ACT of typing), rather than the feel of doing it. Once you learn how to wield a fork and knife as a child it's as if your hand disappears. You're not aware of its action, only of what you want to happen because of it - you darned well know where those fork prongs are, but where is your pinkie finger? As I sit and type this, I honestly can't tell you where the heck it lies when I use silverware.
And on and on.
After awhile what I've found is that my body takes over and feels the pure joy in just living that tends to get buried under the 'in-your-head'ness of it all....and that visceral joy commandeers your attention and emotion, so you can't help dancing just a little too.
On the inside, of course.
And like I said, it's subtle.
But just for kicks, try it. Give it a go. Tell me what happens.
Today's whiteboard quote:
"One doesn't discover new lands without consenting to lose sight of the shore for a very long time."
~Andre Gide
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Weekend Bliss and Caffeine A'Comin
Today is Thursday. And what does that awesome fact infer?
Oh yes, that tomorrow is Friday.
Which means the weekend.
It had been awhile since I'd textually danced, filled with bliss for my love of weekend anticipation.
What do I have planned, you ask?
Nothing.
And that fact in itself is nothing short of delicious.
I'm very excited, can you tell?
I'm also excited because a couple of days ago I got my very first moolah for writing - that means I'm actually a professional writer now, and can call myself such....at least that's what they tell me :) I got a chapter in a book published some time last fall, but who knows if it's been printed yet (or even if it will be, considering that this was before the economic slump). Besides, if there aren't any funds, I don't consider it pro. Even now, I don't really consider myself professional because I won't believe that until I'm making a sizable chunk of my monthly income from writing - if it don't pay the bills, it don't count as professional....to me, at least.
All this one paid for was my new lovely coffeemaker that I ordered from Overstock (love that site!) on Tuesday:
But wait, I don't drink caffeine...often.
However, the Santa Monica pier concerts start next week. If we go, it will be cutting a bigger piece of my REM cyclage out than I'm comfortable with. As in, miserable Fridays from sleep deprivation. I love them, though, and so does T - even more than me, in fact.
I made him this deal.
I'll go to the concerts with him every Thursday night if he'll get up pre-dawn with me every Friday morning and make me coffee :)
I think that sounds fair.
On that note, here's today's whiteboard quote:
"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it."
~Goethe
Now get busy!
Oh yes, that tomorrow is Friday.
Which means the weekend.
It had been awhile since I'd textually danced, filled with bliss for my love of weekend anticipation.
What do I have planned, you ask?
Nothing.
And that fact in itself is nothing short of delicious.
I'm very excited, can you tell?
I'm also excited because a couple of days ago I got my very first moolah for writing - that means I'm actually a professional writer now, and can call myself such....at least that's what they tell me :) I got a chapter in a book published some time last fall, but who knows if it's been printed yet (or even if it will be, considering that this was before the economic slump). Besides, if there aren't any funds, I don't consider it pro. Even now, I don't really consider myself professional because I won't believe that until I'm making a sizable chunk of my monthly income from writing - if it don't pay the bills, it don't count as professional....to me, at least.
All this one paid for was my new lovely coffeemaker that I ordered from Overstock (love that site!) on Tuesday:
But wait, I don't drink caffeine...often.However, the Santa Monica pier concerts start next week. If we go, it will be cutting a bigger piece of my REM cyclage out than I'm comfortable with. As in, miserable Fridays from sleep deprivation. I love them, though, and so does T - even more than me, in fact.
I made him this deal.
I'll go to the concerts with him every Thursday night if he'll get up pre-dawn with me every Friday morning and make me coffee :)
I think that sounds fair.
On that note, here's today's whiteboard quote:
"Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it."
~Goethe
Now get busy!
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Snippet
Today's whiteboard quote:
"Out of clutter, find simplicity. From discord, find harmony. In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity." ~Albert Einstein
That's about as much as I'll post today - it's a busy one, and that quote is gonna help me more than ever with my outlook, whew!
Oh, and this (a pic of M from our shoot a couple of weeks ago):
"Out of clutter, find simplicity. From discord, find harmony. In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity." ~Albert Einstein
That's about as much as I'll post today - it's a busy one, and that quote is gonna help me more than ever with my outlook, whew!
Oh, and this (a pic of M from our shoot a couple of weeks ago):
Monday, June 8, 2009
A case of the Mondays...
"The first rule is to keep an untroubled spirit. The second is to look things in the face and know them for what they are."
~ Marcus Aurelius
Today is Monday.
While on some weeks that fact is responded to by inward (and outward) groans and grimaces, this Monday I'm glad. To be completely honest, after a properly enjoyable weekend, I'm ready to get into the swing of the week again because a part of me misses the driven productivity of my workaday world. Isn't that what weekends should be anyway? A respite from the life that makes you need a respite?
Of course, in an optimal world, your whole life would be enjoyable and you wouldn't need a respite. I'm not referring to winning the lottery and going to live in seclusion on a private island, although that's what most of us tend to think an "enjoyable" life would be - truthfully I think we'd also be pulling our hair out in a month from the boredom of it. What I mean by an enjoyable life is one that is balanced - that has play, work (that is fulfilling and that speaks to your spirit, whichever language that takes), love for the feeling of it, interesting things for the thinking of, and ways to enjoy your body (physical exercise, etc.) all in amounts that combine to make a satisfying life. Not just a life that satisfies you, but one that also serves the greater good...
It's one of my beliefs that if everyone followed what their heart truly wanted them to do in life, they would end up doing things to benefit the world and themselves. It may be naive, but from what I've felt and seen in myself and others I believe it to be true.
So anyway, back to Mondays.
As for me, my life is not perfectly balanced, but I'm working on it. And something that's helping to push me along that path is this nice Monday morning - I can buckle down to work this week knowing that I've also spent time doing things that needed to be done for reasons other than grades and paychecks, those reasons being things like, enjoying the summer:
Happy Monday!
~ Marcus Aurelius
Today is Monday.
While on some weeks that fact is responded to by inward (and outward) groans and grimaces, this Monday I'm glad. To be completely honest, after a properly enjoyable weekend, I'm ready to get into the swing of the week again because a part of me misses the driven productivity of my workaday world. Isn't that what weekends should be anyway? A respite from the life that makes you need a respite?
Of course, in an optimal world, your whole life would be enjoyable and you wouldn't need a respite. I'm not referring to winning the lottery and going to live in seclusion on a private island, although that's what most of us tend to think an "enjoyable" life would be - truthfully I think we'd also be pulling our hair out in a month from the boredom of it. What I mean by an enjoyable life is one that is balanced - that has play, work (that is fulfilling and that speaks to your spirit, whichever language that takes), love for the feeling of it, interesting things for the thinking of, and ways to enjoy your body (physical exercise, etc.) all in amounts that combine to make a satisfying life. Not just a life that satisfies you, but one that also serves the greater good...
It's one of my beliefs that if everyone followed what their heart truly wanted them to do in life, they would end up doing things to benefit the world and themselves. It may be naive, but from what I've felt and seen in myself and others I believe it to be true.
So anyway, back to Mondays.
As for me, my life is not perfectly balanced, but I'm working on it. And something that's helping to push me along that path is this nice Monday morning - I can buckle down to work this week knowing that I've also spent time doing things that needed to be done for reasons other than grades and paychecks, those reasons being things like, enjoying the summer:
Happy Monday!
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
As WE Are
Today's whiteboard quote:
"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are."
~Anais Nin
I think most of us have a love/hate relationship with sayings and concepts like the one above. On one hand, it gives us the opportunity to change our lives in an instant, just by changing our outlook, and as a result of that shift in perception, to make future decisions that work "toward hope, instead of away from fear" (according to my undergraduate Learning & Behavior prof), and that will make our external lives better, bit by bit, until we one day raise our heads and look around and realize that we can't quite remember what it really felt like to be as unhappy as we could swear we once were....
Man, that sure was a run-on sentence.
But on the other hand, it also puts the pressure on us to choose how we want to live, and to choose how we want our lives to be. Once you realize that there is a choice, how can you justify making the choice to be unhappy? Also, once you realize there's a choice, how can you justify not doing things to improve the world, in whatever small or large way(s) that you can?
So having that power isn't necessarily always a good thing, from our own perspectives.
I know that I often sigh in begrudging frustration when it occurs to me, after a bad day or a fight or an unproductive week, when I'm feeling bad about myself anyway, that the whole thing is mostly, if not all, my own fault.
Yes, things happen that are outside of our control. But how we handle them is always within our control.
Dang.
So, with this knowledge of choice in my arsenal, I'm off to make my goals for the day, the week, the month (or, until I forget and need to be reminded again :) )
How will you choose to be?
"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are."
~Anais Nin
I think most of us have a love/hate relationship with sayings and concepts like the one above. On one hand, it gives us the opportunity to change our lives in an instant, just by changing our outlook, and as a result of that shift in perception, to make future decisions that work "toward hope, instead of away from fear" (according to my undergraduate Learning & Behavior prof), and that will make our external lives better, bit by bit, until we one day raise our heads and look around and realize that we can't quite remember what it really felt like to be as unhappy as we could swear we once were....
Man, that sure was a run-on sentence.
But on the other hand, it also puts the pressure on us to choose how we want to live, and to choose how we want our lives to be. Once you realize that there is a choice, how can you justify making the choice to be unhappy? Also, once you realize there's a choice, how can you justify not doing things to improve the world, in whatever small or large way(s) that you can?
So having that power isn't necessarily always a good thing, from our own perspectives.
I know that I often sigh in begrudging frustration when it occurs to me, after a bad day or a fight or an unproductive week, when I'm feeling bad about myself anyway, that the whole thing is mostly, if not all, my own fault.
Yes, things happen that are outside of our control. But how we handle them is always within our control.
Dang.
So, with this knowledge of choice in my arsenal, I'm off to make my goals for the day, the week, the month (or, until I forget and need to be reminded again :) )
How will you choose to be?
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Dispositions
Today's whiteboard quote:
"I have learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not on our circumstances."
~Martha Washington
That said, today is not one of my best days.
I can feel annoyance simmering right there, under the surface, primed and ready to rear up and rip someone's head off.
(figuratively, of course)
At times like these, I have a little system that I use, and that, when I actually do it, bats 1000.
First, I take a few deep breaths and have a moment of contemplation, wondering what the heck is wrong with me. Today, the answer to that is my feeling of stagnation. I just churned out that paper and was doing everything at a (needed) breakneck pace, and now things have slowed down a bit, and I'm having to wait on other folks (and their busy schedules) in order to meet my goals, and it's rough on me.
The next question is - in my estimation of what the ideal Charis would be and do, what should I do with my time now? (in other words, what would she do?)
So, I sit down with my little notepad and schedule out my day, including all of the things that she'd do (with a cheerful smile of course - remember, this is a perfect world that I'm going off of here).
And for the rest of the day, the focus will be on the list. I know that if I leave the moment-by-moment decisions up to me, ain't nothin gettin done.
Wish me luck! And I'll work on that disposition! (crossing off lists makes me happy, so I'm thinking my mood will be steadily increasing from here on out, as now I can cross off "blog" :) )
"I have learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not on our circumstances."
~Martha Washington
That said, today is not one of my best days.
I can feel annoyance simmering right there, under the surface, primed and ready to rear up and rip someone's head off.
(figuratively, of course)
At times like these, I have a little system that I use, and that, when I actually do it, bats 1000.
First, I take a few deep breaths and have a moment of contemplation, wondering what the heck is wrong with me. Today, the answer to that is my feeling of stagnation. I just churned out that paper and was doing everything at a (needed) breakneck pace, and now things have slowed down a bit, and I'm having to wait on other folks (and their busy schedules) in order to meet my goals, and it's rough on me.
The next question is - in my estimation of what the ideal Charis would be and do, what should I do with my time now? (in other words, what would she do?)
So, I sit down with my little notepad and schedule out my day, including all of the things that she'd do (with a cheerful smile of course - remember, this is a perfect world that I'm going off of here).
And for the rest of the day, the focus will be on the list. I know that if I leave the moment-by-moment decisions up to me, ain't nothin gettin done.
Wish me luck! And I'll work on that disposition! (crossing off lists makes me happy, so I'm thinking my mood will be steadily increasing from here on out, as now I can cross off "blog" :) )
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Positive Pause
Today will be devoted to finishing up my DQP, so please accept my apologies for lack of a proper post.
Go here instead - it'll help make your day better, I promise.
Today's whiteboard quote:
"Make the world a better place, one thought at a time."
~Unknown
Go here instead - it'll help make your day better, I promise.
Today's whiteboard quote:
"Make the world a better place, one thought at a time."
~Unknown
Friday, May 8, 2009
Opportunity
Today's mantra (and whiteboard quote):
"The fool sees difficulty in every opportunity, the intelligent one sees opportunity in every difficulty."
~Nahsti
Today I'm running late, and am (still) hormonal (which for this 2-hour span = feeling insecure about any and everything), so I have my work cut out for me.
How about you? What opportunities will you choose to see today?
Happy Friday!
"The fool sees difficulty in every opportunity, the intelligent one sees opportunity in every difficulty."
~Nahsti
Today I'm running late, and am (still) hormonal (which for this 2-hour span = feeling insecure about any and everything), so I have my work cut out for me.
How about you? What opportunities will you choose to see today?
Happy Friday!
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
To Get Anything Done
Today's whiteboard quote:
Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world. ~Lucille Ball
Lucille Ball, you say?
She, actually, was a heck of a woman, especially for the time she lived in. T used to work at Paramount, and I found out when I started dating him that, since she was a workaholic, she designed a small courtyard outside her office at Paramount Studios to look like her back yard. She'd have her children come to work with her and play there. She also had the front to one of the buildings made up to look exactly like one of her houses. Because of these things, she
#1) felt more at home, which is nice when you work a lot (hence my candle warmer here)
#2) could do photo shoots and record media messages from right outside her office, but seem like she was at home, perfectly balancing all the things involved in being a working mother, and taking wonderful care of her children.
Smarty pants, that one.
But back to the quote.
Every day I pick quotes that speak to me and that (sometimes I hear), end up speaking to the people who walk by my office every day. That's nice. But, to be 100% honest, the quotes are only up for selfish reasons. So, today, as I was trying to avoid getting dry-erase dust on my white sweater while I wrote this one out, I did a little mental check.
Do I love myself? ...I think so. Yeah. Sure I do. Hmm. What's the catch? Um, I need to drink more water. Okay, I'll drink more water today. And I need to work on more positive thinking. And I need to get my website up. And I need to remember to run those errands this afternoon.
...and before I knew it my mind had sprinted into to-do list mode, which later, after I realized what I'd done, showed me that I've run into the same pitfall that I think a lot of young professional women (and at-home women. And not so young women. And men) fall into. And that's measuring our own opinion of ourself - our effectiveness, worthwhile contribution to the world, basically right to be living and be loved, even by ourselves, by how much we accomplish.
There's something wrong with that. My Reiki teacher once gave me a huge lecture on how, especially for women, so much thought is given to, and weight is put on, being "enough". Doing enough. Saying enough. Cooking enough. Making enough money. Giving enough love to those we love. Being interesting enough.
She said that, sooner or later, you have to be able to just sit, quietly, calmly, and smile and say, with an appreciative and relaxed sigh, I am enough.
And I nodded, perplexed, because I really had no idea what she was talking about and I was halfway listening with the other half of my mind thinking about how I had to stop by the store on the way home and calls I had to make and homework I had to finish and a flight I had to book for the holidays and how I'd schedule out time to visit both my family and friends and how I needed to take something out of the freezer to thaw it for dinner and the new wall treatment I was working on and how I needed to update my AIM info (yes that was back in the days of AIM) and what I was going to do that weekend and.....
-and now, years later, after I've grown and changed and seen babies born and loved them and massaged their little feet, and after I've had my heart broken a couple times and seen that, even when someone DOES seem to do enough, if it's true that they're NOT enough (not really, not for me), then it doesn't matter.
And now I have some new friends and some old ones and a new(ish) love that has shown me that, if you love the core of someone, what they do, today, doesn't matter at all, because it doesn't define you - so you can love someone even if, tomorrow, they choose to go to clown school or something and derail all you thought that they were going to do...
So shouldn't that count for yourself too? The love at the core, for all that you have the ability and potential to do, moreso than what's checked off of that to-do list?
Seems to make sense. Now, just to do it.....
Just sayin. Thoughts?
Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world. ~Lucille Ball
Lucille Ball, you say?
She, actually, was a heck of a woman, especially for the time she lived in. T used to work at Paramount, and I found out when I started dating him that, since she was a workaholic, she designed a small courtyard outside her office at Paramount Studios to look like her back yard. She'd have her children come to work with her and play there. She also had the front to one of the buildings made up to look exactly like one of her houses. Because of these things, she#1) felt more at home, which is nice when you work a lot (hence my candle warmer here)
#2) could do photo shoots and record media messages from right outside her office, but seem like she was at home, perfectly balancing all the things involved in being a working mother, and taking wonderful care of her children.
Smarty pants, that one.
But back to the quote.
Every day I pick quotes that speak to me and that (sometimes I hear), end up speaking to the people who walk by my office every day. That's nice. But, to be 100% honest, the quotes are only up for selfish reasons. So, today, as I was trying to avoid getting dry-erase dust on my white sweater while I wrote this one out, I did a little mental check.
Do I love myself? ...I think so. Yeah. Sure I do. Hmm. What's the catch? Um, I need to drink more water. Okay, I'll drink more water today. And I need to work on more positive thinking. And I need to get my website up. And I need to remember to run those errands this afternoon.
...and before I knew it my mind had sprinted into to-do list mode, which later, after I realized what I'd done, showed me that I've run into the same pitfall that I think a lot of young professional women (and at-home women. And not so young women. And men) fall into. And that's measuring our own opinion of ourself - our effectiveness, worthwhile contribution to the world, basically right to be living and be loved, even by ourselves, by how much we accomplish.
There's something wrong with that. My Reiki teacher once gave me a huge lecture on how, especially for women, so much thought is given to, and weight is put on, being "enough". Doing enough. Saying enough. Cooking enough. Making enough money. Giving enough love to those we love. Being interesting enough.
She said that, sooner or later, you have to be able to just sit, quietly, calmly, and smile and say, with an appreciative and relaxed sigh, I am enough.
And I nodded, perplexed, because I really had no idea what she was talking about and I was halfway listening with the other half of my mind thinking about how I had to stop by the store on the way home and calls I had to make and homework I had to finish and a flight I had to book for the holidays and how I'd schedule out time to visit both my family and friends and how I needed to take something out of the freezer to thaw it for dinner and the new wall treatment I was working on and how I needed to update my AIM info (yes that was back in the days of AIM) and what I was going to do that weekend and.....
-and now, years later, after I've grown and changed and seen babies born and loved them and massaged their little feet, and after I've had my heart broken a couple times and seen that, even when someone DOES seem to do enough, if it's true that they're NOT enough (not really, not for me), then it doesn't matter.
And now I have some new friends and some old ones and a new(ish) love that has shown me that, if you love the core of someone, what they do, today, doesn't matter at all, because it doesn't define you - so you can love someone even if, tomorrow, they choose to go to clown school or something and derail all you thought that they were going to do...
So shouldn't that count for yourself too? The love at the core, for all that you have the ability and potential to do, moreso than what's checked off of that to-do list?
Seems to make sense. Now, just to do it.....
Just sayin. Thoughts?
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Resolution Resolutions
Only one word to describe my day: CRAZY. I won't go into the details, let's just say that it was one of those days. Not bad, just so busy that I think, at one point, my head may've been spinning around, exorcist-style.
Anyway, on to other things. Now that there's about a month left til the new year, I'm making resolution resolutions.
Sound silly? Ok, yes it does. But it's not, actually. Here's how it works -
You take stock of this past year, and see how you did. See what you want, and how you'd like the next year to go.
According to the Stages of Change Model, the first thing you do when there's time to make a major change is "precontemplate" it. As in, kinda sorta thinking about making the change. Or, even realizing that how things currently are isn't how you'd like for them to be, and therefore acknowledging that perhaps some sort of change would be a good idea, even if you don't know what the change would look like. (note: if you follow the link, they're talking a lot about addiction or destructive behaviors. I learned it while getting my master's in health, and the spin I was given was on picking up a healthy habit using the model, like exercising or eating right. Just sayin, ignore the negative stuff if you're reading up on it, as that's not really what I'm referring to here.)
So, this is my month of precontemplation. And, I am very excited to say, that there will be big, AWESOME changes in this next year! And, in this month, all I'm going to do is think about them. I'm not allowed to actually do anything. I'm going to build up steam, then be rearing to go by the time the new year rolls around. Stay tuned for updates, in a month :)
So, what might you get excited about in the new year?
Anyway, on to other things. Now that there's about a month left til the new year, I'm making resolution resolutions.
Sound silly? Ok, yes it does. But it's not, actually. Here's how it works -
You take stock of this past year, and see how you did. See what you want, and how you'd like the next year to go.
According to the Stages of Change Model, the first thing you do when there's time to make a major change is "precontemplate" it. As in, kinda sorta thinking about making the change. Or, even realizing that how things currently are isn't how you'd like for them to be, and therefore acknowledging that perhaps some sort of change would be a good idea, even if you don't know what the change would look like. (note: if you follow the link, they're talking a lot about addiction or destructive behaviors. I learned it while getting my master's in health, and the spin I was given was on picking up a healthy habit using the model, like exercising or eating right. Just sayin, ignore the negative stuff if you're reading up on it, as that's not really what I'm referring to here.)
So, this is my month of precontemplation. And, I am very excited to say, that there will be big, AWESOME changes in this next year! And, in this month, all I'm going to do is think about them. I'm not allowed to actually do anything. I'm going to build up steam, then be rearing to go by the time the new year rolls around. Stay tuned for updates, in a month :)
So, what might you get excited about in the new year?
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Fighting off the Funk with Gratitude
I woke up in a funk today. Well, I also woke up in a funk yesterday, and the day before. No one can be happy all the time, right? And my disproportionate anger at the auto-correct function on my word processing program this morning (no, I want it lowercase you idiot, it's an abbreviation! Not a new sentence! aaarrrgghh @#!&*%$@! ~all in my head, of course~) leads me to believe that the problem may lie in the hormonal realm. Happens to the best of us, what can I say.
Even my whiteboard quote of the day:
Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson
just makes me snarl. That's right, I said snarl. As in when the right side of your nose does that little wrinkle and your lip curls up a bit in the corner? It's a snarl. And I did it. (enthusiasm. I got your enthusiasm right here, I'm thinking...)
Shame on me!
So, what to do? It's not fun being in a mood like this, unless of coure you're in college and driving around Gainesville w/ your new bff and you're griping Foamy style (warning: bad language abounds if you follow that link) at anything and everything, that's fun (shoutout to you, Jen!). But, alas, I'm a grown-up now and being in a ranty mood doesn't help anyone. Plus, I'd rather not do it. I like having normal blood pressure, thanks very much. Besides, over the years I'd much rather form smile lines than yucky frowny lines...
But I digress. So, this morning as I was in the bathroom down the hall after breakfast, flossing, mouthwashing, and brushing for the 2nd time today (I'm not OCD - ok well maybe I am, but not about this particular thing. Constant spotless teeth is how you've gotta roll when you have Invisalign - you can see my loosely related vlog here) because you have to do that if you put ANYTHING other than water in your mouth (no snacking, not even any liquids like juice or tea or god-forbid, soda. Water. That's it.). Oops, there I go again. Anyway, as I was flossing or brushing or something, it occured to me through my grumpy fog that my life is much more enjoyable when I'm in a better mood. And there's no reason why this funk of a mood should have me helpless in its clutches! But it kinda did. So, I pulled out an old faithful that's appropriate for this time of year - giving thanks.
I've said for a long time that a way to pull yourself up at times like this is to do a simple, conscious switch of attention - it's easy, all you have to do is start giving thanks. For anything. But make sure it's stuff that you ARE actually thankful for. For instance, here's how mine started:
I give thanks that I'm finally getting my teeth straightened after I've been self-conscious about them for so many years....although I didn't even mean to, my dentists told me I needed to straighten them because of other stuff...And hey, it did force a diet, but I don't really care about losing weight. There's a marketing ploy - come get Invisalign! Lose 5 pounds for 5 grand! Although, for $5k couldn't I just get lipo? I mean, I doubt lipo would even be $5k....
Focus.
Ok...I give thanks that I have a job.
I give thanks that I can afford to have and keep in stock all the dumb things I need for my teeth.
I give thanks that I can afford more than a few pairs of shoes to wear to work (as I clipclopped down the hallway back to my office)
I give thanks that my body all works as it should and I am not confined to the use of a wheelchair or crutches.
I give thanks that I work in a place that is well lit and safe and clean.
I give thanks that my job isn't one that puts me into any physical danger.
...and on and on. And sure enough, before long, I started to feel better. And now, retelling it, I feel even better. The goal is to continue this all day. It can be easier or harder, depending on the day, I suppose.
But it's true. Most of us do have plenty to be thankful for. And later today, when I saw a link to this random blog by Jason Mraz, I took it as the sign that it was - to tell me that I am on the right track. An article that says the exact thing I was doing is healthy, is coincidence? I think not... So, not even using the cheesy Turkey Day stuff (that's for Thursday, don't spoil your dinner now) what do you have to be thankful for?
Even my whiteboard quote of the day:
Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson
just makes me snarl. That's right, I said snarl. As in when the right side of your nose does that little wrinkle and your lip curls up a bit in the corner? It's a snarl. And I did it. (enthusiasm. I got your enthusiasm right here, I'm thinking...)
Shame on me!
So, what to do? It's not fun being in a mood like this, unless of coure you're in college and driving around Gainesville w/ your new bff and you're griping Foamy style (warning: bad language abounds if you follow that link) at anything and everything, that's fun (shoutout to you, Jen!). But, alas, I'm a grown-up now and being in a ranty mood doesn't help anyone. Plus, I'd rather not do it. I like having normal blood pressure, thanks very much. Besides, over the years I'd much rather form smile lines than yucky frowny lines...
But I digress. So, this morning as I was in the bathroom down the hall after breakfast, flossing, mouthwashing, and brushing for the 2nd time today (I'm not OCD - ok well maybe I am, but not about this particular thing. Constant spotless teeth is how you've gotta roll when you have Invisalign - you can see my loosely related vlog here) because you have to do that if you put ANYTHING other than water in your mouth (no snacking, not even any liquids like juice or tea or god-forbid, soda. Water. That's it.). Oops, there I go again. Anyway, as I was flossing or brushing or something, it occured to me through my grumpy fog that my life is much more enjoyable when I'm in a better mood. And there's no reason why this funk of a mood should have me helpless in its clutches! But it kinda did. So, I pulled out an old faithful that's appropriate for this time of year - giving thanks.
I've said for a long time that a way to pull yourself up at times like this is to do a simple, conscious switch of attention - it's easy, all you have to do is start giving thanks. For anything. But make sure it's stuff that you ARE actually thankful for. For instance, here's how mine started:
I give thanks that I'm finally getting my teeth straightened after I've been self-conscious about them for so many years....although I didn't even mean to, my dentists told me I needed to straighten them because of other stuff...And hey, it did force a diet, but I don't really care about losing weight. There's a marketing ploy - come get Invisalign! Lose 5 pounds for 5 grand! Although, for $5k couldn't I just get lipo? I mean, I doubt lipo would even be $5k....
Focus.
Ok...I give thanks that I have a job.
I give thanks that I can afford to have and keep in stock all the dumb things I need for my teeth.
I give thanks that I can afford more than a few pairs of shoes to wear to work (as I clipclopped down the hallway back to my office)
I give thanks that my body all works as it should and I am not confined to the use of a wheelchair or crutches.
I give thanks that I work in a place that is well lit and safe and clean.
I give thanks that my job isn't one that puts me into any physical danger.
...and on and on. And sure enough, before long, I started to feel better. And now, retelling it, I feel even better. The goal is to continue this all day. It can be easier or harder, depending on the day, I suppose.
But it's true. Most of us do have plenty to be thankful for. And later today, when I saw a link to this random blog by Jason Mraz, I took it as the sign that it was - to tell me that I am on the right track. An article that says the exact thing I was doing is healthy, is coincidence? I think not... So, not even using the cheesy Turkey Day stuff (that's for Thursday, don't spoil your dinner now) what do you have to be thankful for?
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