Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Lines Blurry

Where's the difference between creating the life you want to live and walking the path that's been laid out for you, and is the one that you're supposed to be walking?

This morning I asked to be directed to live my best possible version of today.

I was taught that we all have multiple lives, days, realities we can live in each moment. It's a range, but there is a best one. Or maybe, a couple of best ones.

I was thinking about the thing that is an afternoon. Usually I don't know afternoons; my mornings bleed into noons which merge to afternoons and before I know it, the sky is darkening and I'm driving home.

Not that I mind the traffic these days (good contemplative time. Good people watching, too), but I do wish that I could live the different parts of my day, rather than the same minutes, or at least interchangeable ones, from morning to early evening, under the same fluorescent lights.

Today on my drive in I noticed the sky. I often do, but today I thought that I need to make sure to do that more often. I've been falling off lately.

In high school I remember my friend Brian G laughing at me and saying that I looked at the sky more than any person should. I miss being able to see it.

Then, I remember how nice it is sometimes to live my days this way. How long days can seem when each day is really four or five days, and not long in a good way.

So, finding the difference between the best path and your own choosing of a path? I'm not sure.

But I'm working on it!

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